How to Add Excitement to Your Marriage

Wait for a good opportunity to arise to have some time to yourself, say, when your husband has to go downstairs to the basement and fiddle with the cable modem.  Then do the following:

1. Make a cup of tea with honey.
2. Take off your clothes.  I prefer to strategically uncover myself without actually undressing, but I am very modest, plus we have theater lighting up in here.  You may do whatever suits your fancy.
3. Sit in bed and blog like it’s not weird you’re blogging with what appears to be no shirt on.
4. Wait for reaction when spouse enters the room.
5. Explain you’re trying to be funny when your spouse asks why you’re nude and blogging.
6. Continue to explain that YOU FEEL FINE, you were just trying to be funny and you’re not really naked, SEE? (oh)
7. Grapple the phone away from your husband as he tries to call your psychiatrist.
8. Redress and consider it a mission accomplished.  That did qualify as excitement.

It is also fun to wear a strapless maxi dress and hunker down behind a table and call someone on Skype, with only your shoulders and head visible, keeping the dress below the camera line.  They will scream, trust me.