Half-a-Homeschool Drop-Out
I just can’t TAKE IT ANYMORE.
We’re facing a dilemma. There are three possible outcomes:
1. Rhys goes to preschool. We’re going to “tour” the preschool he WILL be starting either next week or the following Monday. We’re “touring” for the sake of making Rhys feel like it’s just a casual “maybe” when in fact he is going. OH HE IS GOING. I can’t work with him here. He whines, he fights with Henry, he distracts, he throws tantrums, he yells, I spend 80% of my time putting him in time-out or sending him to his room. He is an absolute handful right now and it’s impossible to incorporate him into Henry’s learning, I’ve tried. It doesn’t work. This is totally unfair to Henry and preschool is viable and safe option for Rhys. If he will allow himself, he can have fun, play with others his age, learn and get out of the house for a couple of hours each week. I just hope he’ll acclimate and not…do his thing. Both boys will still do CC.
2. Rhys will NOT work with the preschool folks and they won’t let him stay. This is entirely possible. If he acts there like he does here, they won’t keep him. They couldn’t – they’d have to structure the entire class around his behavior and that’s unfair to the whole class! In that case we continue on as we have been and hope Henry learns something and everyone is miserable. We will still do CC.
3. Henry goes to public school while I try and deal with Rhys’ behavior. I’ve already put in a call to the Vice Principle at the school he’d go to but I haven’t heard back from her yet. If I don’t hear today, that is not encouraging to me. Someone could call me back, I had a very specific question – what curriculum is used for phonics and math. I really don’t care who calls, I just want to know what the 1st grade uses. In this case Rhys will do CC for the rest of the year, but Henry will have to drop out but we can always do the material at home with him 
It’s been a hard, hair-wrenching, tear-filled week. I feel completely overwhelmed. I feel like I am failing at everything I am doing: housework, being in charge of the family finances, laundry, homeschooling Henry, disciplining Rhys, food shopping, meal preparation, meal PLANNING, lesson planning!, getting everyone ready every Sunday morning, getting everyone out of bed everyday and out the door, worrying about our retirement, health insurance, savings account, keeping everyone in clothes that fit, trying to keep the outdoors cleaned up to the best of my ability, it’s just…a lot. And then you add to that the fact that I’m still struggling with my dad’s death and sad because I can’t see my mom a lot to help with that and feel alone a lot…it’s just very hard, this daily life.
Sorry for the pity party. Not sure I should have published it. Rhys is back to pitching a fit. I just want to crawl in a hole! GARRR!!!
Posted on October 19, 2012, in Donna being Donna, Homeschooling, Kid Stuff and tagged CC, Classical Conversations, Curriculum, difficult preschooler, Education, homeschool, overwhelmed mom, Preschool education, public school. Bookmark the permalink. 13 Comments.
Oh Donna, I am so sorry you are going through all this! We are facing a difficult year of homeschool b/c of Gage right now, too~ so I understand *some of* what you are going through with Rhys!
We have had some of the same conversations and tried to find a part time preschool for Gage but he was too young for the part time programs, so for now, we’re just surviving the school portion of life some days….and we have talked about just sending them to school since we want to do what’s best for everyone involved, but so far we feel like this is the best option for all of us.
I love the title, since Half-A- …. blog sometimes makes me want to drop out (other times, I’m thankful for the few ideas I take from it!).
haha
Just know YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I would guess most hs moms go through things like this at different times, as our lives change and our kids change and go through different seasons. And it IS HARD!!! That last paragraph made me laugh, b/c I’ve written things like that in my journal on many occasions…it is SOOO MUCH! Sometimes it feels far too overwhelming for me. Sometimes I have to let certain things go, the hardest of which are the things I have decided I “have to” do to a certain degree.
Letting go of my own ideals is tough, as is figuring out what can give in this life…I’m praying for you as you work it all out!
Oh no!! I hate you’re going through the same thing with Gage. I never would have guessed that, he seems like he entertains himself so well and he’s been my inspiration for wanting a fourth. “See! Gage is so sweet and just plays and we could have another and they’d just entertain themselves and…” LOL!! It’s so hard to know when you just get a small glimpse of the inner-workings of someone’s household.
And yeah, HSing *is* hard. It kind of takes over your life (and your house if yours is like mine – I need that basement finished already). I could literally spend a couple of hours each day on CC stuff – but we don’t have that kind of time, nor do my kids have that kind of attention span at this age, not sure I do either to be honest.
I will pray for you as too, as well as the rest of our fellow HS moms!! Thank you so much for your comment, it was so reassuring!!
That’s funny…(what you said about Gage)! Ask any one of my kids if school is *fun* with Gage! You might get an earful! Now LIFE is fun with him, yes! He is such a sweet little guy but he wants ALL the attention as soon as we sit down for school. And he has brand-new 2 yr old fits. Dealing with all that with 3 kids in 3 grades to teach…yikes. But we know each year things will change, so we hold out that next year will be better.
As far as CC work, we only go over it all a couple times a week (and busier weeks, 0 times!), and then we listen to it each time we get in the car, 3 times through usually before we can turn on the Toby Mac jams they (ok, we) all love. The great thing is that they’ll memorize all the same info another time, and that time, my guess is it will be easier since they’ll all be older. Thanks for the prayers!
I hope the number one option will work out. I am praying.
Thank you, Joyce!
I think every-homeschooling Mom goes through times like this. It’s a huge load to carry. There maybe more options than the three you listed, though. Maybe cutting back and simplifying your 1st grade curriculum for a year so you can focus on other things? We’re with you. We’ve all been on the brink before.
How many days a week would you work with a 1st grader? We do four. I’ve cut back subjects to just math and phonics (he does reading on his own or at night with us) so I don’t know how I’d reduce those any more. Hmm..
Donna, we all have days that we look longingly at the yellow bus. (((hugs))) Praying for you guys.
Thank you so much <3
What preschool are you looking? Colt loves it! He goes 4 days a week from 9-12 this year as opposed to 2 days a week 9-12 last year. He’s learning tons and we still do stuff at home in the afternoons for about an hour – no pressure though if we miss. I hope Rhys looooves it! Maybe he will meet a bff
I just thought of a fourth possibility. What if you found an online school for the rest of the year for Henry? That way while he is working you could be disciplining Rhys. You could be teaching the little guy how to behave while Henry is working-without disturbing Henry. Does this make sense? If you Have to put him in school, I will support you with my love and prayers. But I hope you can avoid the yellow bus.
I would do this, but NC doesn’t offer online school. I’ve looked into it because I thought it would be a good alternative too. Great minds, hmm?
I even looked into some kind of paid, private online courses, but they don’t seem to start until 4th or 6th grade.
Worst case, we’ll muddle through until Rhys gets a little more mature. He told me tonight he gets sad that I am paying more attention to Henry than him. I’d rearranged the homeschool area (again!) so his play area is directly beside where we work, so hopefully this will help him feel closer to us but not distract Henry too much. We will see. And maybe he will like preschool – who knows?! Once he gets to know people, he is really outgoing, a total chatter box and a ham. It’s night and day. Please pray we see the day and not the night! Thank you so much for your support!!
I hope changing the school area will help. I also hope preschool will help. I wish I could help you. After the first of November, I wont’ be gone all the time. Is there something I could do at a certain time maybe 2 days a week that would help by skype –like read to him or teach him a drawing lesson maybe? I was thinking of teaching Henry, but maybe Rhys would like some attention from a computer teacher. You could tell me what to read that would fit in with his classes.